The last two weeks have been tough for me. The whole Mr Flash saga has flared up again, work has been terribly busy and of course problems withmy car. all this has left me drained, overly emotional and just generally a little stressed. Cutting myself even came to mind a few days ago. I would have loved to have felt that blade slice through my skin. The little rush of adrenelyn you feel when the blood starts to drip through your arm. Sorry if thats a little graphic but those who have been there will know.
But I stayed strong and didn't go there. The thought of trying to hide it afterwards, the sympathetic face of the boyf if he saw it. It's something so private that i just couldn't do it.
Last night though I got what I needed - sleep. Mr Flash had been at work for pretty much 24 hours trying to solve some technical thing. I went straight round after work. He expected me to be awake and full of energy and had apologised for being sleepy but explained he wanted to be near me, to feel my skin near his. I wasn't fussed. By half seven I was looking pretty dead myself and by 8pm we were both tucked up in bed. We were both so relaxed and extremely horny and had sex but it was different. Cuz our bodies didn't have the energy to put up that fight of being a little self concious it felt amazing. Granted I could have fallen asleep inside me but the otrgasms (note the plural!) were.....amazing (was trying to think of another word but can't).
Both of us laid there and then it came. That blanket of warnth which comes when your mind and body switch off completely. So badly needed. I feel so much more chilled now and I have the whole weekend to do what I want without the boy.
Bliss xxxxx
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